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I Am ElderSpeak – A Poem

07 May 2013/1 Comment/in /by

I am ElderSpeak

by

Antoinette Ford

It seems that everyday now someone will ask me why I founded the Double Nickels? How do you create theatre from reminiscences? Or they will ask some version of a similar question. The answer for me is simple. I am sincerely passionate about wanting to know….period. It is the journey that I find so compelling and to understand what those that went before did, what they knew and experienced is what gives meaning to what I do now. When I listen deeply I learn that the simple things experienced by ordinary people are what make the world so rich.  I feel compelled to say these things now because of words recently spoken to me…”the older I get, the more I realize how little I know”. And the more I realize I don’t know, the more I reach into the well of wisdom and words given to me by those that came before. So, I want to know them better.  I wrote the following words when I was looking for myself a few years ago. I’m still finding pieces of the whole. I hope that’s because I am still growing.

                              I Am ElderSpeak 

First born – Only Grand

First Grade —Only “A”s

First Grad –8th grade

High School

College Too

First Love – Only heartbreak

First to Leave Our home

First Sadness to this point

First Black, Only Woman

Ships and schools and careers

Only Marriage – 40 years

Only Child – again

This time – my child

A First daughter

Only Successes to this Point

And more — many, many more

And Then

First Loss, Only Fear

First Trial, Only Failure

No control – Must let go

First Insecurity – Run Away

STOP

START AGAIN

Reclaim Your Strength

Search for those anchors

Find Those Souls Who Gave

You Strength, Wisdom, Purpose

Where is your Passion and Perception?

Find your Persistence and regain focus

Now Share – Give Back.

What do you have that’s not yet been used?

How can lessons learned be spread?

All the Elders now are dead

You are ElderSpeak.

Console yourself, Reclaim your place

Embrace the New First borns

Remind the New Onlys that

Like the seasons – they too will come,

Grow, fade, die and come again.

I am ElderSpeak

My ‘cello sings

My voice resounds

My words define

My acting cries and dramatizes

Memories from a long past time

And all proclaim My Life.

Ambidextrous Mother

Beautiful, brilliant Grandmother

And yet another Perceptive and Persistent

Great –Grand,

I knew them all and well, for

I am Them All.

“Use all your talents” was their prod.

“Find them, let them define your life”.

“Nothing can stop you, but you must start”.

It does not matter when.  Use all your talents

All your life”.

Late to come but found for sure

My Art is now My Life.

 

© 2010 Antoinette Ford

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Flying Saucer

03 Mar 2013/0 Comments/in , /by
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First Tour in Europe

12 Sep 2012/0 Comments/in /by

We crossed the Atlantic aboard the Military Sea Transport Service vessel, General William O. Darby, en route to Casablanca. After a brief tour of Casa, our next stop was Southampton where I received shore liberty. Well, I was a corporal along with being the assistant 1st Sergeant on board. It lent some privilege after all. We left port after some eight days and the last night in Southampton, the Brits showed my friends and me a good time at the Pub. Next stop was Bremerhaven.

That was interesting to say the least. Nobody knew what to do with me. Here I was a trained Electronics Countermeasures/Counter counter Measures Equipment Operator and there was none in the theatre. But as I had enlisted, the army could put me anywhere it wanted, as I was just a warm body. After a day or two of deliberation it was decided that I be sent to Berlin for an assignment with the Berlin Brigade. They were short on NCOs’ so the army said “tag, you’re it!”. Now the Commanding Officer of Headquarters Company Berlin Brigade was a Major. I reported in as directed. He had my file in front of him, not that it was all that thick, and “Hmm’d”. I was much puzzled but made no comment. Then enter my sergeant chevrons. He just said that I was to put them on and report back as he tried his NCOs’ before he promoted them. Well, being the stupid dumbjohn, I asked if the money went with them. Not a good question to ask of a Major. His response set me aback. “Corporal, there are two ranks that I have little use for, having held neither and that is corporal and 2nd lieutenant!!”. Again with the dumb question. “Sir, how did you manage to become a Major without having to become a 2nd lieutenant?”

“Soldier, I jumped out of an airplane over the island of Corregidor. I’m sure that you are familiar with its location. I went out of the door as a pfc and landed as a 1st lieutenant, company commander as all key echelon cadre had been killed on the way down!” Of course my response was, “Yes Sir!”. I did an about face and left his office.

The 1st sergeant had already opened my duffle bag and put a set of chevrons on my other jacket. He held it while I pulled of the other, helped me on with it, then shoved me back through the door to the Major’s office. I then reported, “Acting sergeant Kershaw reporting as ordered, Sir!”

By John Kershaw

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Ten Grains of Rice

12 Sep 2012/in /by

Grandpop Taylor. He was the meanest, stingiest man I ever knew. When my grandmother Taylor died, my grandfather left my eight year old uncle Timothy in the house by himself and went to live with his girlfriend. I’m not lyin’. The way we found out was that my Dad, Timothy’s older brother, went by my grandparents home a few weeks after my grandmom’s funeral and Timothy was in the kitchen cooking. When Dad asked him where was Pop, he said he had gone. Gone where? To live with Miss Bessie. Anyway, that’s the short version of how uncle Timothy came to live with us.

Well, my grandfather never changed and when he became an old man he came to live with us because he had no one but my Dad. Oh, he had money ‘cause he never spent any but he didn’t have anybody giving a hoot about him….except my Dad, his son. Grandpop was living on the third floor of our house and everybody gave him a wide berth. Except me. I always was trying to see what I could get away with. He didn’t play with us kids much but he always was looking for somebody to go to the store for him or to perform some other task.

Well I was always looking for ways to make movie fare or money for comic books or something. So, one Saturday morning I decided I’d see if I could get Grandpop to pay me to do some work for him. I put on my best “favorite granddaughter” face and quietly went up to the third floor. Grandpop was in his kitchen cooking. When I got to the top of the stairs I could see that he was cooking his dinner. I began telling him all the good things I had already done that morning like sweep down the basement steps and clean out the refrigerator. As only he could, he looked at me and said, “That’s what you should be doing. Now what do you want from me?” I screwed up my courage and said I was looking to do some chores for him so that maybe he would help me get to the movies that afternoon. Now, this is the closest a child in my family could ever get to asking a grown-up for money. I dare not ever ask directly for money or be suspected of begging for anything. Grandpop asked me what did I have in mind as a chore that would be worth something. I thought for a few minutes and finally said “I’ll iron your shirts if you want”. He said, “Alright, there are some in the laundry basket”.

I ran over to the laundry basket, took out nine shirts, sprinkled them down, got out the ironing board and promptly went to work. About an hour later, proud of my handiwork I showed Grandpop the shirts nicely hung on wooden hangers. He looked at them, grumbled something about some wrinkles around the collars. I took them back to the ironing board, spiffed up the shirts and returned again to Grandpop. It was almost time to go to the movies and I wanted to get paid.

That’s when the problem started! My Grandpop Taylor asked me how much did he owe me!! My god, why did he do that? Didn’t he understand I could never tell him he owed me money? Well I squirmed and I danced and I smiled stalling for time. I was thinking as fast as I could. All the time Grandpop was washing his long grain rice. Finally, I got what I thought was a great idea. It would take me off the hook and at the same time help my Grandfather decide how much to give me for my services. I said, “well Grandpop, there were nine shirts that I ironed. Why don’t you give me ten grains of rice…nine for the nine shirts and one for doing them so well?” I thought this would be a great way for me to get at least a dime and more likely 50 cents. Genius at work.
My Grandfather looked at me, smiled a mean smile and counted out 10 grains of rice. After he finished counting out the rice he looked into my unbelieving eyes and as cool as a cucumber said, “in life, you only get what you ask for”.

I took the 10 grains of rice; I did not say thank you and that was the biggest insult I could muster. I ran down stairs but I did not cry. I went to my father and asked him for 50 cents. He said, “Why are you asking for money just like that young lady? How do you plan on earning it?” I said, “ I’ve already earned it. I’m asking for the money because I’m only going to get what I ask for”.

My Dad gave me the 50 cents. My Grandfather gave me a valuable lesson. But I never did like that man.

By Antoinette Ford

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